Google

Saturday, April 19, 2008

santa banta jokes-2

1.Preeto Santa’s wife was going to her Parents and was packing the suitcase with need-full.
Santa goes to his friend Bantu and says, “She is so innocent and loving that she even takes the condoms with her for remembering me.”

2.Virtues of Virginity
Our hot headed Santa broke his engagement with his girl friend Preeto because rumors were abound that she was pure virgin, People asked Santu, "Why?, Why, Santa Why?"
Santa explained, "That woman could not be of any other man, how would she be mine?"

3.Santa and Banta Tid-bits
Santa : Why did the man put his radio in his refrigerator? Bunta : I give up.
Santa : Stupid, because he wanted to hear cool music
Jasmeet : "Your honor, I want to divorce my husband Santa." Judge : "But why ?" Jasmeet : "Because he is not faithful to me." Judge : "How do you know ?" Jasmeet : "My lord, not a single child resembles him."
Jasmeet : "What do you like most in me: my pretty face or my body?" Santa : looking at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of Humor.
Bunta : I was away for a week. Yesterday I sent a fax to my wife Preeto that I'd be home tonight, and when I got into my room I found Preeto in another man's arms. Santa : Kept silent for a few minutes, then cooly said, "Maybe, she didn't get the fax."

4.Santa and Banta got lost at the mall. So they go to the map, where they see a red arrow that says:
YOU ARE HERE Santa looks at the Banta and exclaims:
"WoW! How do they know that?"

5.Some Santa and Banta Jokes
In UK, Santa & Banta saw a poster at a Police station: Two White men wanted for Rape.
Santa: These bloody goraas always get the best jobs!!
Santa and Banta were watching bungee jumping. Santa: Wanna try it?
Banta: No way. I was born because of broken rubber & I don't wanna die because of it.
Three men discussing wives.
1st says my wife is very cold. 2nd says mine is very hot. Santa: I'm confused. I think shes is cold but people say she's hot.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

latest SMS JOkes

1. Potato, Tomato, Carrot, Brinjal, Cauliflower, Cucumber, Beans, Apple, Banana!!
Are yaar, kya dekh rahe ho? Pure veg message hai, Aaram se forward karo!!

2. English Teacher: Make a sentence using "Neither-Nor"
Naughty Student: When girls wear tight fitting dresses, "NEiTHER" are they comfortable, "NOR" are we!

3. Dil armano se houseful hai Dil armano se houseful hai,
Poore honge ya nahi yeh doubtful hai, Is duniya mein har cheez wonderful hai, Per zindgi aap jaise logo se hi beautiful hai.

4. 5 lovely words - i will top my class 4 pleasant words - I will work hard 3 sweet words - i luv studying 2 special words - my books 1 important word - LATER

5. Socha ttha har modh par tumhara saath denge, Socha ttha har modh par tumhara saath denge, Par kya kare kambakhat sadak hi sidhi nikli

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Santa Banta Jokes

1.Mrs. Banta (Preeto) was in the habit of having long conversation on the telephone, sometimes going on over two hours at a time.
One day she hung up just after 20 minutes....
“What is the matter today? asked Santa. “Today you had less than half an hour conversation on the phone.”
“I got a wrong number,” replied Preeto.

2.Banta fell in love with a porno star and married her. He got an opportunity to watch one of her movie.... the Movie came to an End.
A bit disturbed and annoyed with what he saw, Banta told himself, "Thank God it was just a movie and not reality."

3.It's Christmas time and Santa and Banta decided to go look for a Christmas Tree.
They gathered their axe, a sled, and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them. When they finally reach a fine stand of trees, Santa brushes off the first tree, and stands back with Banta to look at it.
"Well, Banta, What do you think?"
"Sorry, Santa, this tree won't do. Let's try another one".
They come upon another nice tree, Santa brushes it off, and they both look at it.
"How about this one?"
"Not quite, Santa. Let's keep looking".
This goes on until nightfall. Both Santa and Banta are cold, tired, and hungry.
"Well, Santa, what do we do now?"
"Banta, I think we should take home the next tree we find, whether it has lights on it or not..."

4.Santa: Mein Shimla ja raha hoon, Me meri biwi tang aa gaya ho, sochta ho jate hau raaste mein meri biwi ko khai mein dhaka de doonga.
Banta: Yaar meri bi ko bhi le ja, use bhi dhaka de dena.
Santa: Theek hai, agar tu bura na maane use vaapsi me dhaka de doon?

5.Santa & Banta go out Fishing
Santa and Banta decided to rent a boat on a lake for their favorite sport fishing.
After fishing for 4 hours at various places around the lake with no luck at all they decided to try one more spot before calling it quits, Suddenly things started to happen, and they caught plenty of fish within twenty minutes.
Banta said, (Hey we should mark this spot, so next time we will know where to come) Santa says good idea, and he took out a can of spray paint and made a large X on the floor of the boat....to mark the spot.... Seeing that Banta shouted, why did you do that, now anyone who rents this boat will know where to fish!

6.An Englishman, an Scotsman and our Banta went on a mountain-climbing expedition together. Everything was going fine until one day, while they were walking along a narrow ledge, an avalanche ripped away the ledge on each side of them.
As they stood there wondering what to do, with the freezing night closing in, there was a strange shimmering in the air and a good fairy appeared, floating in front of them. She raised her wand and declared that, as they had all been good and the expedition was sponsored for charity and so forth, she was to rescue them from their terrible plight. Each of them could wish to be transformed into any bird of their choice in order to get safely off the mountain, and would return to their normal form once they reached home.
She turned first to the Englishman and asked what he wanted to be.
"A swan," he replied, and a beautiful white swan replaced him. Stepping off the ledge, it spread its wings and flew off for England.
The fairy turned to the Scotsman, who immediately and proudly chose a golden eagle, which he became. With a magnificent swoop, he launched from the ledge and soared away, glorying in the freedom of flight as he returned home.
Banta watched the two birds disappearing into the distance from the ledge as the fairy turned to him. "And what bird do you choose?" she asked.
He thought, and mused, then said, "A penguin."